Old cycling quirks and quips

Like most Aussie gatherings there is a parochial language known to the members, such as knick names for events and training tracks such as “the goose neck”, “the turdie”, “the ball biter”, “the juvey”, “the scenic”! At the most opportune time sayings and quotes are given to riders to suit the situation.

Cycling being a “hard man” sport the old saying when the going gets tough the tough get going so the weaker riders cop a fair hiding in the repertoire of sayings. Couldn’t pull the skin off a rice pudding, or could not ride out of sight on a dark night. Along the same lines, just like a boarding house cup of tea “big and weak!” or the rider on the day that had glass in his shoes and could not push too hard on the pedals. Let’s not forget the sit on sprinter who works on the philosophy the only good turn is the one at the chequered flag.

The newcomers to cycling are often called a Hubbard as they have the greasy chain ring mark on the freshly shaven right calf or the scared rider that fell off and had to have an operation to get the hands to let go of the handle bars. There is the occasional rider that are coined the phrase as erection riders for their upright stiffness on the bike.

Stories of out on the road; when the hammer was dropped the wind was so strong the last bloke was so far down the edge of the road he was ducking the cows head hanging over the fence. Riders were hanging on so hard that were chewing on the head stem, and another was sucking the grease out hoping for extra energy.

We have all heard the term they were on the rivet, these riders may have been taught to ride a good time trial you start off flat out and gradually increase.  Some hard riders are referred to as like a rat up a drain pipe (they are hard on the wheel) always being on the “demorage” (the attack) leaving other riders “Shookted” burnt off.

A tall riders bike is referred to as farm gates due to the massive bar lengths in their frame. Out the road in the peleton the real work is being done in the engine room, and those just hanging on for grim death are in the white wash or washing machine. The call to be up the road down the road or shut the road down are all terms that the hard men know and relate to when the pressure is on.

When a rider had a bad run of falls they are “autumn leaves” eating their dinner off the mantel piece due to the amount of skin they have lost off their backside. The dabber is the rider on brakes too often, a softy a puncture, chamois time is for the café riders to gauge their performance. Sure this is only what can be printed and there is many more for the reunion day.

On Monday 13th March 2012 of the long weekend The Bendigo and District Cycling Club will be holding a club reunion. If you intend being part of this amazing day please call Keith Browell on 0407527578 or email keithb42@bigpond.com.  Cost is $20 cover the cost of catering.

Looking forward to seeing you on the road soon God willing.

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